Thursday, March 11, 2010

31

So, I'm 31 today. And, rather than bore you with deep thoughts and reflections (both of which I always tend to do on or around my birthday), I thought I would share a rather humourous email that went out to everyone who works for the Grand Rapids Housing Commission. There is a particular employee who sends these types of emails out for everyone's birthday. Enjoy...

Hey everybody today is Jake's birthday!!! He is 18 years old today! He's very excited about finally being able to vote, and today after work Todd's going to teach him how to smoke! Jake is the newest member of our management team so it's very important that we make him feel welcome by giving him a hard time about it being his birthday today!

Fun Jake fact: Before deciding to become a manager, Jake spent many years training to be a cage fighter. His first and only match was against a guy who went by "Frank The Hammer." Frank was 6'9 and weighed in around 400lbs. Frank had a serious anger management problem and his two passions in life were making people bleed in funny ways and cat grooming. Their match lasted 50 seconds...that may not seem like much time but Frank The Hammer was able to accomplish quite a bit in that 50 seconds, he managed to tie Jake completely into a knot and remove him from the cage by straining him through the bars...he also found the time to tear off Jake's ear and eat it. Which leads me to another-

Fun Jake fact 2: Jake has a prosthetic ear. He is very self conscious of this prosthetic ear so please don't stare at him trying to determine which ear it is (Hint: it's the one that looks like a plastic ear) because of his prosthetic ear Jake has to actively avoid wind tunnels and trampolines.

If anybody else knows of any "Fun Jake facts" please feel free to share them!

Happy Birthday Jake!!!!

1 comment:

April said...

I found this blog entry via my friend Heather's, and I also live in GR, and I think your birthday email is THE BEST. I intend to remember this idea to use on future coworkers...